A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft house 4 inches deep.
A 3-year old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing batman underwear and a superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit.
A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
Playdough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
Super glue is forever.
VCR's do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.
The Fire Department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.
The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
It will, however, make cats dizzy.
Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
80% of men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.